Family and Children’s Services of Frontenac, Lennox and Addington promotes positive discipline as a means to teach children to develop their own self-control so they can become independent responsible adults. Children who are hit may get the message that hitting is reasonable behaviour. Children who are treated aggressively by their parents may be more likely to be aggressive themselves and to take out their anger on others.

What is reasonable discipline? The law presently allows parents to use "reasonable force" to discipline children. What's reasonable depends on the situation, but many forms of physical punishment that were acceptable in the past are no longer permitted. Any form of physical discipline that requires medical attention, or results in bruising, welts or broken skin, is not considered reasonable discipline. Physical discipline of babies is also unacceptable.   

The following is a list of suggestions for implementing positive discipline:

• Gain control: Although the best time to teach is as soon as possible after an incident has occurred, the main priority is to gain control over your own anger. The teaching should be motivated by a desire to help the child learn a better behaviour, not motivated by hostility.
• "Time out": Temporarily remove the child from the environment or activity as a means to correct undesired behaviours. This should be for a realistic time period such as one minute per child's year of age. With older children use grounding or a reasonable loss of privileges.
• Redirect: A child playing with a ball inside the house could be directed outside.
  Make amends: Children learn responsibility when guided to demonstrate age appropriate accountability. A 3 year old may say "I'm sorry" and a 10 year old may pay for damages from allowance.
• Praise and encouragement: Acknowledge and reward the behavior you want repeated.
• Be a role model: Actions speak louder than words. Children learn how to behave by doing what they see adults doing.
  Consistency: Consequences should be clearly stated and consistency enforced.